Schools, Work and Stress

Lest anyone thinks that this whole move has been seamless, there have been two lingering sources of stress for us. We committed to moving long ago when we bought our plane tickets and the house leases were both signed back in February but where the kids will go to school and how Marty will continue to work from Germany have been a bit stressful and a constant thought in our minds. We knew that things would need to be given time in both the work and school categories to sort themselves out but the waiting has been hard.

As I said before, our first choice school is the German/American John F. Kennedy school (photo below) which is located less than half a mile from our rental house .  According to google maps that makes it a 9 minute walk or a 4 minute bike ride = dreamy school commute!

I have emailed, called and done as much as I can do to "check up" on our status from this end but we still have not heard a definitive answer from any of our top 3 schools. We do know that homeschooling is actually illegal in Germany so that option (as so many well meaning friends have suggested) is not possible.  

When I make calls to Germany it is quite an ordeal because 1) I do not speak German 2) I do not understand German and 3) Because of the time change I either have to stay up past 11 PM - which is way past our bed time or be up and on the phone by 5 AM - which is much earlier than I'd like to be up.  Nonetheless, I have called all three of our top pick schools at least once.   When I called JFK a few weeks back and all of the secretaries were out sick (!?!) and the principal answered.  I didn't know it was the principal so I asked if he could answer a few of my questions regarding admissions.  His reply: "NO, because I AM the PRINCIPAL!" Thankfully he didn't know who I was or who my children are as I'm pretty sure I offended him. 

I called again a few days later and spoke to an American secretary but still not much help.  This was pretty much her answers: "If you haven't received an email from us regarding your child's acceptance then there isn't a status to update. Yes, one of your children could be accepted at JFK and not the other and be aware.  Most other Berlin schools have very different calendars and vacation days making having your children at two different schools quite difficult. There is no way to know your chances of getting in. Yes, you are at the top of the priority list with only American diplomats or Department of Defense children being accepted before yours. We are always full and when  a space becomes available we let you know. If you accept admission from another school and then are accepted here that would be between that school and you.  Clearly, I can not give you legal advice. I have a long line in front of my desk.  I must go.  I'm sorry my answers were not more satisfying to you. " 

There will be a lot to learn or thicker skin to grow during our year there.  I am used to the Mexican or Central American approach to people.  If I had made the same type of call to a Mexican school I can imagine a lot more chit chatting and warmth and even if they had given me incorrect information there would have attempts at building a friendly relationship and efforts to not offend.  I can remember many times while traveling in Central America when I needed to ask a local about directions or local information.  They would typically go on and on about how to get somewhere or when a festival started or something and then I'd find out later (when lost or on the wrong day for the festival) that they actually knew very little about what they were talking.  But instead of offending me and just saying that they didn't know and potentially disappoint me would rather go on and on with misinformation while trying to be friendly.  The Germans will tell you the straight up truth every time.  Plain and simple.  It being satisfying to you is not important to them.  There are definitely pros and cons to each cultural style.  

We did get another email from JFK saying that all applicants should hear something about admissions by the end of May.  Well, here we are.  May 31st and still nothing. Fingers and everything else still crossed that the kids are accepted and we hear confirmation of this soon.  My hair is turning grayer by the day! 

What we will do for work has been another discussion.  I'm currently teaching Spanish at co-op preschool part time.  I am not a German citizen as the rest of my family is so I am not allowed to work until I get the German equivalent to a Green Card.  All of the International Schools I looked into required a 2 year commitment and we only plan to be there for one. And if we get into our first choice school, Benjamin would only go to school from 8AM until 1PM  making having a real job for me quite difficult.  I may look into subbing jobs or tutoring or teaching English once we are there and settled.  

Marty's work situation was a bit easier to figure out but not much.  When we first decided to move we talked about him just doing his Twisted Scholar video production work from Berlin.  He is under contract at the radio station through December so our worst case scenario plan was that he would help get us settled in August and then he would come back to finish out his work contract with a few trips back to visit us throughout the Fall and Winter. When he brought up his plan to move his bosses were unbelievably cool about it.  They definitely did not want to break up the great morning show team and all wondered if it would be possible for him to continue doing the show but from Berlin. Well, Marty from Berlin but the rest of them from the radio studio in Seattle. 

In the weeks that followed that initial meeting they have given him all the tools, technology and resources he needs to be able to do the show remotely.  He, fortunately, has the brains to put it all together and make it work. One brilliant suggestion was to try it out before we even leave the country.  Even though they would just be across town from each other, it would feel a lot like what it would feel like from Berlin.  For the past couple of weeks he has been doing his radio show from our basement studio while Jodi, Pedro and Luciana are all back in the downtown Seattle radio studio.  It is quite amazing that you cannot tell one bit of difference and I'm REALLY listening.  It is yet to be seen whether it will actually work from Berlin but they all seem to think that it will.  The best part of the plan is that his crazy early start (and bed) times will become MUCH more palatable due to the time change.  His normal 5AM until 10 AM shift would become 2 PM until 6 PM!!  And because the equipment needed to do the show is so small (just a small box/machine/thing, a microphone and his laptop) he can literally take his show on the road and he can continue to do it while we are traveling, which we plan to do a lot of.  The kids and I could go to the pool or a beach or a museum for a few hours while he knocks out his show all while visiting Portugal, or Bulgaria or Finland!! 

Our thumbs are pressed (which is what the Germans say instead of 'fingers crossed') that both schools and work fall into place!!

Deutschland - 2 Months and Counting

Two months from today we set sail on a year long family adventure.  For many many years Marty and I have talked and dreamed about living in Europe for a year.  About 10 years ago I had really good friends that moved their family to a small Italian village.  When Josie was only 6 months old we visited them there for a few days.  This visit only fueled our fire and they became our inspiration.

In the beginning, before kids, we tossed around the idea of 6 months in Germany and 6 months in Spain to feed both of our interests and passions.  After having kids we realized that dream would be very difficult because of school, consistency, and work.

 On the advice of our friends who had lived in Italy they said "it won't happen unless you put a date on the calendar."  With that advice in mind, this year while doing our annual goals and accomplishments (something Marty and I have done every year on or around New Year's Day for the past 13+ years) we threw out the idea of moving to Germany with a leave date of August 1st, 2017.
Within three weeks of writing down this goal nearly every major component of our move fell into place.  We found 3 amazing schools to apply to, found a beautiful family home to rent which was less than half a mile away from our first choice school and found a family from Wisconsin to rent our Seattle home while we were away.

Once these major pieces fell into place so easily and effortlessly,  we were able to keep moving toward our goal on momentum alone.   It truly was quite amazing and we often felt that we were just being taken down a river and to fight it would be more work than just giving in and going with the flow.

A few weeks later we booked our first-ever, one way tickets to Berlin with a departure date of July 29th. This date just so happens to be our 12th wedding anniversary.  It feels perfectly appropriate to say "I do" on that day to another grand adventure and this time as a family of 4 instead of just 2.

Josie has always been totally on board for a year in Germany but wouldn't you know it that this time, when we were finally serious about it, she said, NO!"  No, she didn't want to miss her 5th grade year and overnight camp at her awesome Seattle school and most importantly she did NOT want to say goodbye to her good friends for a whole year.  She initially said she would do 6 months or a semester, no problem.  We contemplated just a half year abroad but then heard that we would not be able to get back into our current school.  I sat her down and told her it either had to be a full year or not at all. To her credit she didn't impulsively shout out an answer.  She took some time to think about it.  She came back to us a few hours later and said that she was fine with a year IF and only IF we get a family dog upon our return.  We felt this was a good deal and agreed immediately.  Since then she hasn't looked back... well, maybe a bit but not for long and is excited about the adventure.  It will be interesting to see how this develops as we get closer to leaving and in our first days, weeks, months there.

Benjamin was very much into the idea which quite honestly shocked us.  He seemed very excited from the beginning.  He has always been the one who does not want to try to understand or speak German.  In fact, when he was younger he would stick his fingers in his ears and yell, "I hate German" at the top of his lungs.  You can see why we were shocked.  It all became clear when I told him we found several great schools there.  He said "Wait!! What??  I have to go to school there?!?"  He apparently thought we were going on a year long vacation. Going to Germany for him had always been about a 2 week vacation where we swam in lakes and pools and had ice cream 3 times a day.  He was all up for doing that for an entire year.  However, I have to say I was quite impressed that he was still into it (although not as enthusiastically) once he realized what we were actually planning.

We are still waiting to hear back from the schools.  Which has been a major cause of stress for me.  The kids don't really understand what it would mean to them if we didn't get into one of our first choice schools which are all bilingual with instruction primarily in English.  Home schooling is illegal in Germany so if we don't get into an International or Bilingual or private school they would go to the local all German school and it would most likely be a pretty tough first few months for all of us. I know they would learn German much much faster with the sink or swim method but one of the other schools would be a softer landing for all of us for sure.

Our first choice school is called John F. Kennedy School Berlin an American/German school which was set up by the Berlin government after the war to foster relationships between the two countries.  It is a well respected, highly sought after, FREE, bilingual school with 40% of the population being American.  Not just English speaking but US passport holding American.  It isn't that we want to surround ourselves with only Americans, in fact it is quite the opposite and we are all looking forward to meeting Germans and other expats from all over the world but for the kids to continue their schooling in a place that feels comfortable and in a language they are comfortable with is quite important to us as we only plan to be there for one year.  We have been told that we have an excellent chance of getting into this school as there is a mandate that 40% of the school population must be American which you can imagine would be difficult to do in a German city.  So, we have planned our whole year around this school and are really hopeful it will all work out.

We have our 2 fall back schools, of course, but we haven't heard back from them about being accepted either.  Time will tell.
Other than schools, the other big stress now is packing up our house and getting ready for our renters.  It is something that should have been done anyway and although it is a TON of work it feels really very good to have less and be more organized.  I keep trying to do a box or a closet a day.

I'm hoping to be a much better blogger and write the good, the bad and the ugly from our year long adventure.  I know when I have blogged before it seemed really insignificant at the time but being able to look back on a family diary of sorts was priceless. Which is why I kept the same blog address. (familyriemer.blogspot.com) Keeping all of our family adventures in one spot.